Finding Peace in Silence

Oh, the silence. Almost – save the din of cars traveling on the freeway. It poured rain last night and when I woke up the mist in the air smelled divine. I thought it might be worth it to crawl out of bed and walk out into it. But I did not – the walk to the beach seemed too far and a walk in the parking lot not quite satisfying. Plus Squid seems to want to sleep in lately.

If I was up north walking outside would have been automatic. Increasingly, and counterintuitively, this #shelterinplace thing simply has me analyzing what I had reticence about – could I live in seclusion in a rural place – i.e. “the farm”?

The peace I find in silence – in non-movement – in solitude…is inextricable. Some voice inside me wakes up and says, “You mean this is okay?”. And from this, I am feeling quiet inspiration erupting.

Up there it would be okay, even sans pandemic. It would simply be daily life.

I am grateful for this time of mental space to read the news in the morning without the pressure of “when am I going to get ready for work” – of not really feeling the desire to be in the company of other but yet knowing that is my fate for the day and, while I will find it pleasant in the long run, my desire for peace in silence is overwhelming and I wish to honor it. Not for a day, or a weekend – but for a month – which I guess I have at least right now.

And then perhaps I consider what choices I make to maintain that.